Tag: meetings

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N.18 Hospitality. The Indian way.

In India, the hospitality is such that they will invite you to their homes to meet the whole family, offer you a chair to sit on and feed you till your belly becomes round.
If everyone gets two portions, you get four.

You may have to learn to say no at some point. Three dosas are enough but they bring you two more and another fried fish. You can say no. That you are full and satisfied but this does not always work. When in doubt, say yes and eat the whole damn thing.

They will serve you tea.
Yes, it’s caffeinated.
Yes, it’s 9pm on a Tuesday and you usually go to bed by 10pm.
Yes, you will have trouble sleeping.
Just say thank you and drink the whole damn thing.

They will invite you to hang out the next day.
You are in India.
You are here to discover the cultures and immerse yourself in all its ways.
Just say yes.
Show up the day after. Eat more. Learn a few words. Imbibe the cultural intricacies.
Have a few laughs and share your humanity.

As you may have already deciphered, it is now 10pm on a Tuesday. I’ve just eaten for two and drank so much tea. I doubt sleep will be kind tonight.

Tomorrow, Karti will show me how to wear the traditional cotton wrapped around the waist, the Tamil way. I am sorry for not knowing the name of it yet. I usually go about it this way:

I say yes. I have an experience. Then, I learn the names of things.

Flash forward two days later.

The name is longui. I have been taught many Tamil and Malayalam words. Even a few in Indie. I laughed so much these last few days with my adoptive Tamil family, the side of my mouth hurts and my eyes are wrinkled. They sure know how to have a proper hang out!

I went fishing for the first time in ages. Armed with a bamboo stick and flour paste as bait on a lake so dirty I did not dare to put in my feet.
I already hear you asking: did you catch any fish? Yes we did. And yes, we ate them.
Still haven’t gotten sick so far. God willing, I never will.

And so, another day concludes itself in the glorious lands of Tamil Nadu, south India.
I am now aiming northward. I have heard about the musicians and dancers in Rajasthan.
I want to meet, mingle and play. I’ve been here one month so far and still haven’t quenched my thirst for jamming.
I shall keep looking outward,
rooted inward,
banjo in hand and ready to play.
Bobcat on the lookout!

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N.14 ‘’The Abdul encounter’’


We have been schooled in the art of generosity.
Out of nowhere, an angel came and offered us what could never be bought.

As we were sitting in the shades of a closed tea stall. Playing music to pass time while keeping a high spirit, There comes Abdul in his desert nomad style of clothing. Only his shining eyes were visible. He listened to us intently for a moment and went away. Reappearing with hot chai meant for us.
And so, our friendship began.

The English being quite limited, we communicated with the heart.
In the evening we ended up at his house with the whole family.
They fed us profusely and we gave our music in return.
Such gratefulness oozing out of these people, the music flowed unobstructed.

At first glance, one may be tempted to call them poor but, in truth, I’ve rarely encountered such richness. A humble home filled with love and smiles trumps everything else.

-‘’God is Giving’’ repeated Abdul.
Eyes shining brightly. Adorned with a true smile.
One hand on his heart and the other to the sky.

-‘’Your happiness is my happiness, brother’’
He’d say while offering us drinks

A true life lesson in kindness.
I am deeply moved by the unconditionality of it.
My perspective of generosity is forever altered.

One of his daughters sparked up by the sight of my banjo and was eager to try it.
A musician in the making!

Javi and I decided to push things a little and give a guitar to the family.
Who knows, we may come back in a few years only to find master musicians.
‘’God willing!’’

It’s important, I find, learning to receive gracefully and give unconditionally. Two sides of the same coin. The coin may have been soiled by our capitalist background: everything becomes a market place. I may be foolhardy but I believe the grandest of riches can never be bought or sold. Life cannot be equated to transactions of commerce.

We come with empty hands and leave just the same.
How grand a journey we create is entirely up to us.

I doubt I’ll remember the dollars I’ve gathered along the way.
Instead, smiles like the ones of Abdul saying ‘’God is giving’’ while handling us freshly cooked fish, that will remain forever in my heart.

God willing, brother, our friendship is only beginning!